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jewish wedding vows
Jewish wedding vows and the words under the chuppah
Jewish wedding vows, the traditional betrothal formula, double-ring options, and how personal vows fit a Jewish ceremony.
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Start writingThe traditional formula
In a traditional Jewish ceremony, the central declaration is the betrothal formula, Harei at mekudeshet li b'taba'at zo k'dat Moshe v'Yisrael, behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring according to the law of Moses and Israel, spoken as the ring is placed on the finger.
In many Conservative, Reform, and Reconstructionist ceremonies, both partners say a version of the formula to each other, often with the gendered Hebrew adjusted, so the consecration is mutual.
Where personal vows fit
Couples frequently add personal vows after the ring exchange and before or after the Sheva Brachot, the seven blessings. Your rabbi or cantor can tell you exactly where additions are welcome in your ceremony's structure.
The ketubah, the marriage document read aloud during the ceremony, is another traditional place where commitments are declared, and some couples commission a text that reflects both partners.
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FAQs
Do Jewish ceremonies have vows like Christian ones?
The traditional formula is shorter and declarative rather than a list of promises, which is why many couples add personal vows elsewhere in the ceremony.
Who decides what we may add?
Your officiating rabbi or cantor, guided by the movement you belong to. Confirm additions during ceremony planning, not the week of the wedding.
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